Brad Trnavsky drives home the importance of expecting to win in every interaction you have with the customer. "If you are picking up the phone and saying to yourself 'I hope this works out' or 'all these leads suck there is no way I am going to schedule an appointment' guess what??? You WON’T schedule an appointment!"

I can't agree more. Selling is tough especially in these times. The fact is you are likely to loose more interactions than you will win. But you never know at the outset how an interaction will end up. This means you need to play to win every time. That can be hard. Here are some ways to motivate yourself to always play to win.

Make relationships an end in itself: We all focus on building relationships. You can't be in sales in this industry if you don't. But we often end up seeing relationships as a means to an end. 'Let me build a great relationship so that I can get more business'. Sounds great, but you end up building only those relationships that you think will lead to business and the fact is you don't. People get transferred, budgets and priorities change and yes, even the Cowboys can get beaten. Build relationships does not have to be a chore. Guy has a great post on building relationships. Making relationships an end in itself will not only improve your numbers, but also keep you pepped up because you get that 'Yeees!' feeling even when you don't sign an SOW.

Examine your own negative thoughts: Next time you think "This is not going to work. She's not going to give me any business", go a level deeper and ask yourself why exactly you think so. You'll be pleasantly surprised that you often have preconceived notions or mental projections that are holding you back- projections that have little to do with reality on the ground.

Think non linear: Before you condemn an upcoming interaction as a 'waste of time', think of what good can possibly come from the interaction. In what ways besides you immediate goal can you leverage the relationship? This could be work related or it might just be plain fun. But thinking non linear can surely enrich your interaction and make it more fun. That way even when you don't get business you will still be having fun. Catching a football game with a client who cannot give you business is a good example.

Think lifetime value: View the folks you sell to as 'clients' and not as 'customers'. Paul McCord has a great post on the difference. Think of what value you can leverage from the relationship five years from now, ten years from now. Not convinced? If you are age thirty or above, make a list of five people who were your peers when you started your career. See where they are now and how they could have helped you today. The fact is you can never predict the lifetime value of a relationship, but you can rest assured that lifetime value in many of your immediate relationships is immense. Think long term and you won't be flustered or beaten down by short term setbacks.